The office manager’s rold and the water cooler crowd

The office manager

The best kind of office manager is an All American guy geared to play ball with the gang-somebody they can call “Bert” and not “Mr. Bertram.” He has to be smart enough to run your business, but too smart to start one of his own. He’s called upon to maintain high efficiency with low labor turn-over, a technique that demands a man who knows how to say the nastiest things in the nicest way.

An assembly line superintendent can let the machinery keep the help humping-but the office manager has to deal with human equations to keep the wheels turning; he has to handle girl-hunting clerks as well as man-hunting receptionists . . . and keep them both working at least a part of the day.

The weight of their woes makes these men so prone to breakdowns that engineers are being urged to devise pushbutton thinking equipment to supplement the personnel. If such a machine ever clicks, ‘Lectric Eddy will be adding up the books and Robot Rosie as receptionist, will surely change the look of the gang that gathers round the water cooler.

The water cooler crowd

More and more pay for less and less work is responsible for office loafers, a group made up of gay blades who grow duller by the day. Most of this clique uses coffee breaks for story telling-ticket selling or horse-picking-then gathers at the water cooler to flirt with the busomy bookkeeper. After lolling on the job for twenty-five years, instead of getting a watch somebody should wrap up the water cooler.

This ulcerless watering clan has charter members in the gals from the steno pool who can type while they smoke, chew gum, put on lipstick, tug at their girdles . . . without ever skipping a comma. This lot is different from the executive secretary who keeps her mind on her work and her eye on the boss’s calendar; if all the executives in America took the same day off the country wouldn’t go to pot … it probably would just run more smoothly with all the Girls Friday sitting in the drivers’ seats.

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